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Whether you’re the kind of person who loves to plan parties or someone who practically breaks out in hives when it comes to making any type of decision, when it comes to planning a wedding, there’s no doubt that having a team of people to turn to for advice and help will make the process a way more enjoyable and stress-free experience. That is, only if you know how to delegate. Between relying on your own mom for wedding planning help, and handing out tasks to your bridesmaids, your future mother-in-law might feel a little left out of the process. Our solution? Let her eagerness dissipate your stress. If you have a ready- and willing-to-help mother of the groom, here are eight simple ways you can include her in your wedding planning process.
1. Give Her Specific Tasks
Chances are the mother of the groom is going to text you, call you, stop by in person and ask how she can help out with any and all things relating to the wedding. Instead of having her take on some tasks you’d prefer to do yourself, give her a list of things she can take ownership of and make her own, so she doesn’t accidentally (or purposely) step on your toes.
2. Ask Her to Come Along With You
Heading to a cake tasting or dress fitting? Give the mother of the groom a ring and invite her to come along with you. Just including her in little things like this will be almost gigantic things for her.
3. Put Her in Charge
If you’re dealing with a very type-A mother of the groom, the best way to handle her is to put her in charge whenever you need a break from making decisions. Say you can’t decide between three different photographers, let her make the final choice. Giving her doses of power like this will help make her feel involved.
4. Let Her Know Your Non-Negotiables
Some mothers of the groom like to plan things and make wedding decisions for you, without you. If there are certain things you absolutely want control over, let her know what they are so she has a heads up that she shouldn’t step on your toes.
5. Pull in a Detail From Her Wedding
One of the nicest things you can do is include a detail, item, or tradition in your wedding from her own big day. Maybe you can use framed photos from her wedding or even serve the main dish that she had at her reception.
6. Let Her Pick Out Her Dress
You may want to keep control over what your bridesmaids wear, but let the mother of the groom pick out her own dress. There’s nothing better than a supportive mother of the groom wearing a dress in which she feels ultra confident.
See More: What to Do If the Mother of the Groom Is Making Wedding Planning a Nightmare
Jen Glantz is a “Professional Bridesmaid” and the founder of Bridesmaid for Hire. She’s the author of All My Friends Are Engaged and frequently wears old bridesmaid dresses to the grocery store and on first dates.