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The Battle of the Bridesmaids is one every bride wants to avoid. After all, you’d hope a group of your closest friends would all love one another as much as you love each of them! But you can’t force your friends to get along, even as your wedding day approaches. What’s a bride to do if a few of her besties aren’t besties themselves? Our experts have some advice.
Fighting friends is always tough, and it’s especially hard when your friends are together for what should be a happy occasion. Before anything gets out of hand, begin by speaking to each friend (separately) about what caused the rift. Is it all due to a misunderstanding, or is there tension because one wasn’t chosen as maid of honor? They might try to tell you everything is fine, but remind them both that you (the bride!) will enjoy all of the pre-wedding celebrations much more if your friends can put their disagreement aside. Encourage them to talk and try to work things out, or to at least be civil to one another. No one is asking them to be lifelong friends, after all!
Going forward, do what you can to keep the drama to a minimum. Arrange for them to stay in different rooms at your bachelorette party, seat a few other bridesmaids between them at your bridal shower, and assign them to spots at opposite ends of your head table at the reception. Making a hair and makeup schedule for the day? Try not to schedule their appointments at the same time. If things are really tense, ask another bridesmaid if she can keep an eye on the situation and help you calm things down if needed.
Has their dislike for one another evolved into full-blown fighting? Ask each bridesmaid calmly but directly if she thinks she can still be a bridesmaid alongside your other friend. Remind her that you’re asking her to stand by your side, not make a new BFF, and then offer her an easy opportunity to back out of her bridesmaid duties if she feels she must.