When it comes to relationships, we often focus on the big things: Money, kids, religion. But, “it’s the small things that end up making or breaking a relationship,” says psychotherapist and relationship coach Toni Coleman. Here, our experts say, are seven small things that can make a big (and often bad) difference to your twosome.

1. Your partner is a rabid sports fan (and you’re not).
It may not seem tough to cheer on your partner’s team, but, “having to build your life around every game can be really trying,” points out Lesli Doares, marriage coach and author of Blueprint For A Lasting Marriage. Sure, you can appreciate the finer points of a well-executed sack — but you can’t appreciate it seems more important to your sports-loving partner than you do. Over time, this can cause tension, Doares warns.

2. Your partner isn’t a great listener.
When you were first dating, you thought your partner was just excited when he or she couldn’t wait until you’d finished your sentence to interject his or her opinion. Now, his or her habit of interrupting hurts. “Frequently interrupting or letting their attention be diverted elsewhere sends a clear message that what your partner feels or needs to express is just not important to you,” explains Coleman. On the flip side, “deep listening does just the opposite.”

3. Your partner spends a lot of time on the phone.
If you’re a Chatty Cathy, beware: “It’s great that you have great relationships with other people, but not so great if you are spending time with them instead of your partner,” says Doares. “It also can be problematic if you are sharing things about your relationship or what your partner is doing that they don’t know is being shared. This is also true if you spend a lot of time on social media with what for your partner may be complete strangers.”

4. Your partner uses the phrase, “yes, but …”
According to Coleman, “When a partner is being vulnerable and asking their partner to own up to something they have done that was wrong or hurtful, and their partner says, ‘yes, but,’ they are acknowledging what is being expressed, but then dismissing it as incorrect and refusing to take any responsibility.” Two small words with a really big impact. “Being able to apologize and accept responsibility for one’s behavior and its impact on your partner says I love you like nothing else,” she says.

See More: Happy Marriage Habits to Start Before You Tie the Knot

5. Your partner has bad table manners.
When it comes to table manners, “not waiting for you before they start eating or leaving you at the table when they’re done is disrespectful,” says Doares. And, if you feel disrespected, resentment can build up, meal by meal. “Same goes with taking the last of the food without finding out if you want more, talking with their mouth full, or reading at the table,” Doares adds.

6. Your partner doesn’t pitch in when you’re pooped.
You can handle almost anything — almost all the time. But when you’re stressed, tired, or overworked, you could use a helping hand. “Ignoring the distress of one’s partner communicates a lack of caring,” says Coleman. “It says, ‘it’s your responsibility — deal with it and don’t expect me to put myself out to help you.’ But jumping in to help and saying, ‘take it easy, I’ve got this,’ is a love language that everyone speaks.”

7. Your partner doesn’t think of you.
You may not mind the first time your partner gets up for a snack and doesn’t ask if you’d like anything from the kitchen. But by the tenth time, you may get a little testy. “Checking in with you about whether you want something to eat too, need a glass of water when they head to the kitchen, getting a plate down for you, whatever it may be, is a sign of awareness and generosity,” says Doares. “Only thinking about themselves in these circumstances is self-centered and does not bode well for the long-term health of your relationship.”

Fortunately, all your fave people have decided to travel in for your wedding — that deserves a major ‘YAY’! But yikes, how are you going to keep everyone occupied in the days leading up to your wedding? Have no fear, we have the comprehensive guide for keeping your friends and fam busy while you put the finishing touches on those pending last-minute details. (Ahem, we know you have 150 favors to put ribbons on over the next 48 hours.)

Visit Buddy Valastro’s bakery
Send guests to Carlo’s Bakery, seen on the show “Cake Boss,” for some rainbow cookies, cannolis, and cupcakes. Visitors can take photos in front of the television-featured bakery and get their sugar fill all while potentially spotting some cake-world celebs. The line is often long, so make sure to tell your guests to wear comfy shoes!

Take a stroll along the Hoboken waterfront
The view of the Manhattan skyline is world famous for a reason. If the weather is cooperating, encourage your friends and family to take a walk along Frank Sinatra Drive where they can take gorgeous photos with the Freedom Tower in the background and marvel at one of the most iconic views in the world.

See More: Finalize All of Your Last Minute Wedding Details With Our Favorite Local Vendors

Explore some family history
Have guests that are interested in learning more about their family background? Give them information for ferries to Ellis Island, where not only can they see the Statue of Liberty, but they may be able to find the original passenger records for family members of theirs that entered the U.S. through the famed port.

Embrace the fear
New Jersey is well known for its many spooky sites, and if your nearest and dearest like to be freaked out, you may want to give them directions to the Devil’s Tree in Basking Ridge, New Jersey. Legend has it that the tree is cursed, with numerous creepy things happening nearby — even in the coldest winter, snow doesn’t fall around it! Make sure your guests have a strong tolerance for weirdness and tell them to keep someone updated of their whereabouts if they do decide to go!

Give your regards to Broadway
If your friends and family have never been to a Broadway musical or play in New York City, hook them up with some tickets to one of your favorites. The Lion King and Aladdin are family friendly, while The Book of Mormon will have adults with a raunchier sense of humor laughing for days to come. (Hit up TKTS ticket booths for discount seats to your fave shows!)

Still not quite sure how to entertain your guests? Check out more of our favorite Local Vendors here!

This is it… The final countdown to your big day. And along with settling those last few details — figuring out where to seat your eccentric Uncle Carl, firming up the flowers — you’re likely also making one last push to make sure the body that will be wearing that gorgeous white gown looks as good as it possibly can. You and nearly every other woman with an engagement ring on her finger. In fact, research shows that an overwhelming 91 percent of brides-to-be are anxious about their weight. But from here on out, you won’t have to be!

Whether you want to drop those last few pounds or look more toned — or both — we’ve got a month’s worth of daily tips (none of which require starving yourself or working out nonstop!) that will help you feel stunning and confident when you walk down that aisle. You know where to send the thank-you card. Let’s get started!

Day 17: Recheck Your Caloric Needs

If you’ve lost a bunch of weight since you started your Wedding Shape-Up Challenge, it’s worth going back to whatever handy dandy online calculator you used, plugging in your current weight and re-running the numbers. (Be sure to pick one that takes activity level and age into account.)

That’s because as you get smaller, so do your caloric requirements. Thinner bodies require less energy. So if you’re still eating like a 150-pound person at your current 140, you might see your weight loss stall — or even begin creeping in the other direction, notes Rachel Beller, R.D., of Beller Nutritional Institute in Beverly Hills and author of Power Souping.

See More: How to Work Out Even When You’re Busy As Hell

Once you have your new daily caloric requirements, you can start shaving off here and there to keep losing weight — if that’s your plan. Rather than making it all about eating less (you’ll be hungry!) or exercise (you’ll be exhausted!) it’s best to marry the two and do a little of each.

Shave 250 calories from your diet each day and burn off 250 calories through exercise and you’ll lose a pound a week. And remember: Being generally more active counts! Even if it’s not a workout day, you can easily burn those 250 calories just by walking here and there — it all adds up.

Just getting started on our 30 Day Wedding Shape-Up? Kick off your journey from Day One, here.

Your wedding guests’ generous gifts mean you’ve got major money to spend. But before you blow it on a leftover wedding registry item, our expert says, you might want to consider a few more money-savvy alternative ways to spend your wedding cash.

“Rather than buying an espresso machine that you might realistically use twice, why not have your money grow so you can achieve your dreams together?” asks Elle Kaplan, finance expert and founder of LexION Capital. “Everything from buying a house to supporting your children financially can be achieved through smart investing, and it all starts with putting a few dollars towards your future together.”

Here are four ideas to get you started with that wedding gift money.

1. Pay off your high-interest debt.
If you have any high-interest debt, then “aim to pay that off before doing anything else with your wedding gift money,” Kaplan recommends. High-interest debt most often comes in the form of credit cards, but take a look at any loans you may have and compare their interest rates, too. Then, “put the biggest chunk of your money towards the highest interest rate debt,” Kaplan instructs.

2. Spend a little — but just a little.
Whether it comes to dieting or investing, “extremes seldom work,” Kaplan says. So if you’re itching to spend some of that wedding gift money, then allow yourselves to indulge. “Just make sure it stays within range,” Kaplan says. “Immediately allotting a small portion — say, $100 — toward something you and your partner can enjoy together will allow you to feel some balance while still investing in your future.”

See More: How to Reduce Your Debt as a Married Couple

3. Add to your retirement fund.
Retirement may feel like it’s a million years away. “But growing your retirement nest egg now will make planning for your golden years exponentially easier,” says Kaplan, who recommends starting with a Roth IRA because your money can grow and be withdrawn tax-free. Plus, “there are low requirements to open a Roth IRA, so even your aunt’s wedding gift can be used to start it off,” she says.

Alternatively, if your employer offers a 401K match, then consider contributing your wedding gift money to your company’s plan. “If you don’t take advantage of your employer matching your contributions, you’re essentially leaving free money on the table,” says Kaplan. “This can make the power of each dollar invested much more powerful, especially when combined with the tax-free growth of 401Ks.”

4. Start an emergency fund.
Sometimes simply saving your money is the best move you can make. Why? “An emergency fund is the way to sleep easy every night and avoid debt when an unexpected expense occurs,” says Kaplan. “Everything from a broken faucet to car repairs can become far more costly if you need to finance them with credit card debt — and that’s why you should save six to eight months of living expenses.”

If you and your groom are beer lovers, why not share your favorite brews at your wedding reception by offering flights of your favorites? Clue guests in on the details of each beer — who brews it, tasting notes, etc. — with descriptive signage and invite everyone to try them all. Check out these six creative ways to incorporate beer flights and tastings into your wedding.

Beer Tastings (above): This bride’s father made these wooden beer-tasting displays so guests could enjoy the couple’s favorite local brews.

Beer Flights: At this couple’s wedding, different beer samplings were passed on trays as a nod to the groom’s love of craft brews.

Beer Tastings: These clever beer-flight displays included the bottle cap to indicate the specific brewery.

Shot Glass Flights: Shot glasses are the perfect size for beer-tasting flights.

Beer Menu: If you’re serving several beers at your reception, it’s a nice idea to create a detailed beer menu explaining the different flavor profiles to help distinguish them all.

Growlers: At cocktail hour, display growlers of beer from your favorite local breweries along with smaller tasting glasses so guests can try them all before picking their favorite.

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Having a nonreligious wedding doesn’t mean you have to write your own vows. If you’re looking to take the pressure off yourselves, consider some traditional phrasing — that’s also easily customizable — that pledges your love and devotion to each other. Whether you want to go spiritual, make it short and sweet, or celebrate what it is that makes your love special, these traditional wedding vows will get you to that first married kiss.

1. I, (name), commit myself to you, (name of significant other), as (wife/husband) to learn and grow with, to explore and adventure with, to respect you in everything as an equal partner, in the foreknowledge of joy and pain, strength and weariness, direction and doubt, for all the risings and settings of the sun. We tie these knots to symbolize our connection to one another. They represent our trust in each other and our combined strength together.

2. Today, surrounded by the people who love us most, I choose you (name of significant other) to be my partner. I am proud to be your (wife/husband) and to join my life with yours. I vow to always support you, push you, inspire you, and above all, love you, for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, as long as we both shall live.

See More: The 9 Most Common Wedding Vow Mistakes All Brides and Grooms Should Avoid

3. I, (name) do pledge to you (name of significant other), my love, for as long as we both shall live. What I possess in this world, I give to you. I will keep you and hold you, comfort you and tend to you, protect you and shelter you, for all the days of my life.

4. I, (name), promise to love, honor, and trust (name of significant other) in sickness and in health, in adversity and prosperity, and to be true and loyal as long as we both shall live.

5. I, (name), take you, (name of significant other), as my wedded (wife/husband) from this day forward. I give you my deepest love and devotion. I humbly open my heart to you as a sanctuary of warmth and peace, where you may come and find a refuge of love and strength. I will weep with you in heartache and celebrate life with you in joy. I pledge my heart to you, for all the days of our lives.

Even though the goal of a honeymoon is to unplug and unwind as much as possible, that doesn’t mean you should leave all your tech gear at home. After all, you’ll want to capture pictures, listen to some tunes, or flip through a book on the beach! Whether it’s helping you enjoy every moment of your getaway or making those hours at the airport a little easier to handle, here are 5 tech items you won’t want to head on your honeymoon without.

Noise-Canceling Headphones
After all the excitement of your wedding weekend (and probably not very much sleep), being able to tune out the world and get some shut-eye on the plane is a great way to arrive a little more refreshed. The Bose QuietComfort 35 Wireless Headphones take their tried-and-true technology to the next level, eliminating the wire in favor of a Bluetooth connection. They won’t get that kid behind you to stop kicking your seat, but it’s a start!

Waterproof Speakers
From a morning at the beach to an afternoon on a sunset cruise to an evening bubble bath, bring your tunes with you wherever you go. The Ultimate Ears UE Roll 2 is completely waterproof (so don’t worry if you run into the ocean with it in hand), but still provides the brand’s incomparable sound. Operate the speaker using an app on your phone, and tuck it into the included pool floatie if you’re ready to lounge in the water. Yes, this speaker comes with its own floatie.

See more: 2016 BRIDES Best Honeymoons: The 10 Most Unexpectedly Romantic Cities

Smartphone Battery Case
Don’t get caught without enough battery to snap those ancient ruins or capture the two of you at a romantic candlelit dinner. Instead, double your phone’s battery life with the iGlaze Ion Battery Case. The beauty of this design is that you’re not stuck lugging around an extra-large iPhone all day. Instead, slip on the charger when you need more juice, then pull it off and leave your phone protected in a slim, shock-absorbing case.

E-Reader
Instead of upgrading to a larger suitcase to fit your beach reads or guide books, downsize to a carry-on and slip the Kindle Paperwhite into your purse. Unlike a tablet, the screen reads just like paper, meaning you can pull it out at the beach without worrying about the glare. And with room for thousands of books, you’ll never be without something to read during those lazy honeymoon afternoons in the sun.

Luggage Tracker
Hopefully you won’t ever need to use a luggage tracker, but whether it’s a lost suitcase on an international flight or an over-crowded baggage area, tucking a device like The TrackR into your bag will give you instant peace of mind. From letting you know how far you are from your item to using crowd GPS and wifi to send you an exact location, you’ll never lose a bag again.

These couples have won the gold when it comes to popped questions — and we’re not just talking about gold engagement rings! There must be something in the protein shakes the Olympic athletes are guzzling, because it seems like everyone is getting engaged at the 2016 summer Olympic Games in Rio de Janeiro! Forgot those Olympic rings — these athletes have their eyes on ones much more sparkly!

According to The Washington Post four pairs of sporty sweethearts are planning to tie the knot after getting engaged at the games. And while Michael Phelps propelling through the water or Simone Biles’ aerial twist and turns sent our pulses racing, our hearts practically flew out of our chests when these questions were spontaneously popped.

Below, check out the four couples whose medals aren’t their only gold swag they scored from the 2016 Olympics!

Isadora Cerullo and Marjorie Enya
First up of the engaged gang is Brazilian rugby player Isadora Cerullo, whose sweetheart Marjorie Enya proposed at the games last week. After the winners of the women’s rugby competition were announced, Cerullo snagged the title of the very first athlete to get engaged at the Olympics, when Cerullo unexpectedly popped the question right there on the field. “I wanted to show people that love wins,” Cerullo told the BBC. Heck, it won the gold!

He Zi and Qin Kai
These two dove into commitment — literally! After Chinese diver He Zi received the silver medal for her performance in the women’s three-meter springboard this weekend, her longtime beau Qin Kai proposed right beside the pool. “He said a lot of things there at the podium,” Zi later told reporters of the proposal, according to CNN. “He made a lot of promises, but the thing that has touched me the most is that I think this is the guy I can trust for the rest of my life.” Kai is also an Olympian champ, taking home both his bride and the bronze medal for the men’s synchronized three-meter springboard. No big deal…

See More: Who Is Nicole Johnson? Everything You Need to Know About Michael Phelps’ Fiancé

He said YES!!! pic.twitter.com/roXsw7oq8f

— Tom Bosworth (@TomBosworth) August 15, 2016

Tom Bosworth and Harry Dinley
After competing in the men’s 20km event, British race walker Tom Bosworth got down on knee on Rio de Janeiro’s Copacabana Beach and proposed to his boyfriend Harry Dinely. “He said YES!!!” the Olympian captioned their proposal pic on Twitter.

#USA's Will Claye proposes after taking Olympic #silver! https://t.co/Bx9Q4hMKai pic.twitter.com/z2naLlsCFn

— theScore (@theScore) August 16, 2016

Will Claye and Queen Harrison
Talk about taking a jump! After leaping his way to victory and snagging the silver medal for the track and field triple jump, Team USA’s Will Claye headed into the stands and proposed to his girlfriend, 2008 Olympic hurdler Queen Harrison. “I’m gonna go out there and do what I have to do on the track first,” Claye later explained to The Washington Post. “And then I’m gonna make her my fiancé after that.” And that, this Olympian certainly did! “It was just something I felt like I had to do today,” he said.

And of course, the bride-to-be had the most fitting #EngagementRingSelfie we’ve ever seen…

Another Olympic proposal! Triple jump silver medalist Will Claye proposed to his girlfriend https://t.co/vzPFDksUsM pic.twitter.com/LRgBb9YTKG

— Sporting News (@sportingnews) August 16, 2016

When Meghan Brophy and Rick Persutti first met during the Dean’s welcome speech on their first day of college at Holy Cross in 2004, neither could have guessed that 10 years later they’d still be side by side. But in May of 2014, Rick popped the question over after dinner drinks while on vacation in Bermuda, and the rest was history. Although their courtship was long, the couple wasted no time in beginning to plan their September 19, 2015, wedding — especially since the bride-to-be already knew where she wanted to say “I do.” “My family has been going to Nantucket since I was born and many of my most cherish moments have taken place on the island,” Meghan says. “When the time came, it was nearly impossible picturing tying the knot anywhere else. I knew from a relatively young age that Nantucket was where I wanted to get married.”

With the help of Nantucket Island Events, the future Mr. and Mrs. dreamed up a sophisticated and elegant seaside affair, including a church ceremony and tented reception on the beach. Read on to see how their day came together, as captured by Christian Oth Studio.

The couple’s 160 guests were welcomed to the island with bags full of goodies. A watercolor map, list of activities, snacks like Cape Cod potato chips, and mini hangover kits made for a fun surprise for traveling friends and family.

Meghan’s French lace Monique Lhuilier wedding dress could not have fit her more perfectly. A sweetheart neckline and cascading skirt added the perfect dose of personality to her otherwise classic gown. The bride had her seamstress sew a piece of fabric from her mother’s wedding dress inside her own skirt.

For her bouquet, the bride knew she wanted an imperfectly round shape in neutral hues of white and cream with subtle pops of blush and blue. The mix of garden roses, ranunculus, dusty miller, astilbe, and muscari Meghan toted down the aisle was exactly what she wanted.

Per Irish tradition, Meghan also kept a five pence coin in her shoe.

Rick and his groomsmen went island classic for the wedding. The men all wore a dark blue dinner jacket with cream trousers and a black satin bowtie. Custom-made navy blue velvet smoking slippers were a fun finishing touch. Meghan’s ‘maids all wore blush gowns with an airy tulle overlay in a variety of different necklines.

The bride and groom exchanged traditional vows at St. Mary, Our Lady of the Isle Catholic Church. “They technically don’t do destination weddings,” Meghan says. “You have to be a resident of Nantucket or have a significant connection to the church in order to get married there. A fellow parishioner usually has to vouch for you if you don’t live on the island full time.”

Guests waved streamers as the couple ran towards a vintage car (decorated with cans!) for their ceremony exit.

The party then moved to Galley Beach, where guests gathered under a tent to celebrate with the ocean just feet from their tables. “Nantucket isn’t just important to my family,” Meghan says. “The island slowly worked it’s magic on Rick, too. He visited me there during the summers throughout college and several years after. So really, at the end of the day, there was no better setting for our party.”

Inside the tent, chandeliers of greenery were suspended from the ceiling while round tables were adorned with low arrangements of hydrangeas, roses, orchids, and thistle.

Gold laser cut table numbers and lots of candles lent a touch of glamour to the seaside space. “We wanted pops of ocean blue throughout the day,” Meghan says, and they got just that with thistle tucked into each menu. “Every single detail we picked was meant to reflect our personality as a couple.”

The tree-tiered wedding cake was decorated with sand-hued fondant and plenty of fresh flowers.

After sharing their first dance to Brett Eldredge’s “Mean To Me,” the duo opened up the dance floor to their friends and family.

The party ended on a high note: Guests waved off the newlyweds (who honeymooned in Bali!) with glowing sparklers. “Soak it in!” Meghan reminds future brides. “The time will fly and you’ll wish you could do it all over again.”

Ceremony Venue: St. Mary, Our Lady of the Isle Catholic Church || Reception Venue: Galley Beach || Wedding Planner: Nantucket Island Events || Bride’s Wedding Dress, Veil & Bridesmaids’ Dresses: Monique Lhuillier || Groom’s Attire: John Robert Custom || Flowers: Soiree Floral || Photographer: Christian Oth Studio

Did you love this Nantucket wedding? Then get inspired by another couple’s beach wedding in the video below.

Wedding toasts: Whether you love them or you hate them, they’re pretty much inevitable. Planning who is speaking at your wedding is a great way to control what you’ll get, but some more talkative guests can be persistent mic hounds. So how can you keep those unwanted toasts to a minimum? Here are a few tips from our experts.

Whether you’ve gotten requests from additional guests who may want to make a toast, know the rest of your bridesmaids want to grab the mic, or have an uncle who gets chatty when he’s had a couple glasses of wine, figuring out how to prevent people from adding to the list of scheduled toasts at your wedding can be a challenge.

One option is to set aside a separate time for people to speak, most likely at your rehearsal dinner. Open up the mic or, if the thought of an hour and a half of toasts gives you hives, create a list of who will be speaking to keep things under control. Make sure everyone knows who is toasting at the rehearsal dinner versus at the wedding so they can be prepared in advance. Happy to have a free-for-all? After the traditional speeches have been made (by the hosts, as well as the couple, followed by anyone you might have specifically asked to speak the night before the wedding), let guests know that if anyone else would like to make a toast, the microphone will be open for the rest of the evening. Just make sure you’ve got someone stationed nearby with a video camera to capture the fun!

Worried someone will snag the microphone during the band’s break? Let your band or DJ, as well as your wedding planner and other venue staff, know that unsolicited speeches are a no-go so they can keep an eye on the mic (or even turn it off until they’re ready to play again). They can help intercept anyone who might want to make a toast, so you don’t have to worry at all.

See more: What Exactly Happens at a Rehearsal Dinner?