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Choosing who makes the cut when you’re putting together your wedding guest list is hard enough. Addressing the situation when you don’t want the guest to come, after all? Talk about stressful. But sometimes, circumstances require that you rescind an invitation, no matter how difficult the situation might be. So when, exactly, can you take back that invite? Our experts break it down.
The situations where you can un-invite a wedding guest are few and far between. First, the times when you unfortunately cannot take back that invitation: If your final guest count exceeds the venue’s capacity, if you’ve gone over-budget, or if you’d rather invite your new coworker than that friend from kindergarten. These are all things you should consider before you send invitations out, so make sure you’re being thorough when you’re making that guest list!
You can, however, politely take back an invitation in a select few situations, such as if you and the guest have had a serious falling out, or if they were invited as a friend’s plus-one (where you know their date better) and the couple has broken up.
If you do come across a situation where you need to ask a guest not to attend your wedding after all, tread lightly. Begin by delicately addressing whatever has made you decide they probably shouldn’t come. This isn’t the time to get deep into your differences, but instead to politely say that, while you greatly appreciate that they wanted to be there to celebrate with you, the circumstances make it seem like it may not be the best decision, after all.
If the guest in question is, for example, your maid of honor’s ex-boyfriend, you probably barely need to have the conversation (if at all). If the two of you had a fight, you might have to explain that you’re concerned that your difficult situation could have a negative impact on your enjoyment of your wedding day.
See more: The 8 People to Cross Off Your Wedding Guest List Right Now