Planning the timeline for your wedding day is one of the last big undertakings, but it starts way before you’re letting vendors know when to show up. At the very beginning, you’ll need to determine the start time for your ceremony and your reception, as it’s information your guests will want to know! If you’re not flowing straight from the ceremony into cocktail hour, how long should the gap between your ceremony and your reception be? Our experts weigh in.

There are gaps that are too long, ones that are too short, and ones that are just right. If you’re stuck with a morning slot at your church for the ceremony, asking your guests to entertain themselves all afternoon until cocktails at 6 p.m. might sound cruel. However, if you plan it right, it can actually be greatly appreciated! You could offer a light luncheon after the ceremony, then give guests time to head out into town or take a nap before the evening festivities. Or, you could simply provide them with recommendations for what to do until it’s time to party. Either way, you may want to encourage guests to pack two outfits: A formal daytime look for the ceremony, then something dressier for the evening. No one wants to wear a tux or a cocktail dress all day!

Having an afternoon ceremony, followed by an evening reception? Try to keep the break around an hour or 90 minutes if possible. This will give guests time to freshen up or grab a cocktail, but won’t be so long that they’re awkwardly wondering what to do while dressed up for the evening. Sure, you and your wedding party will be busy taking photos, but if you have room in the budget to offer a little something for guests (say, a bus tour of the city or an extended cocktail hour), do your best to squeeze it in.

Anything shorter than an hour should ideally be added on to cocktail hour. Either turn it into cocktail hour-and-a-half or bump up dinner service — which will leave more time for dancing later!

Of course, having a ceremony at a house of worship means you’ve got other couples and regular services to work around, so you might not have your pick of times. Make the best of the time slot you’re given, provide your guests with ideas and activities, and don’t forget to have your makeup artist stick around for touch-ups!

See more: Throwing a Destination Wedding? 5 Things Not to Waste Your Money On

Most couples who break up get to do it in private — or worst case scenario — in public in front of poor, unsuspecting strangers whom they’ll probably never see again. But what if you had to get dumped on national television for all to see? For any contestant on The Bachelor or Bachelorette, it’s all too real and most likely going to happen, final rose or not. Since it’s quite the common guilty pleasure to spend a minimum of two hours on a Monday night watching ABC’s most famed reality romance series, we thought we’d round up a list of the most memorable rejections and breakups for your viewing and throwback pleasure.

The Bait and Switch (Jason Mesnick and Melissa Rycroft)

Who can forget the swoon-worthy dad of little Tai who picked Melissa Rycroft during his proposal — in a heartfelt question that would forever change their lives. But on that same fateful day (errr…several days later when it comes to filming time), the indecisive bachelor decided to share with both his fiancé and the entire country that he was in love with another woman: runner-up Molly Malaney. Major burn, lots of tears — it was quite the scene. But, fast forward seven years, and the mama of three is now happily married to Tye Strickland, who also fathered her three children. Just goes to show that there is life after a breakup!

The Non-Committal Bear (Brad Womack …and Everyone)

Even though he ended the series sans life partner TWICE (the first time when he rejected both Phoenix Suns cheerleader Jenni Croft and realtor DeAnna Pappas — and the second being Emily Maynard after initially proposing), we have to pour one out for the adorableness that was Brad and Emily circa 2012. While it seems like he has a bit of a commitment phobia, it’s a fact when we say that Brad is the only Bachelor to appear on the show two times and NOT find love. He attributes their breakup to his temper, according to Hollywood Life. How could we forget, “Don’t poke the bear!”

The Tiny Pilot (Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi)

The Bachelor Season 14 was a fun and romantic season filled with crazies, love, and flying crazy places — which included the day that Jake Pavelka popped the question to finalist (and season’s ‘villain’) Vienna Girardi in 2010. A few short months after their engagement on national TV, the pair decided to break up in a similar fashion — on a live television special for all to see (thank goodness, because that was some special stuff). Among the dirt that the former lovers flung at each other included calling each other a “fame whore,” a “stalker,” and the clincher — that Vienna “undermines” Jake on the reg.

Needless to say, the two parted ways shortly thereafter, according to E! Online — and the rest, my friends, is history. Now we enjoy life’s simple pleasures watching Pavelka dance his way through Dancing With the Stars or perform at Chippendales (wish we were kidding…).

The Suave Soccer Player (Juan Pablo Galavis and Clare Crawley)

Known for his swoon-worthy ways on the show, Juan Pablo Galavis was quite the ladies man on his season. However, when he chose to end things with his much-lusted-after Clare Crawley, it got ugly. “I thought I knew what kind of man you were,” she retorted. “But what you just made me go through, I would never want my children having a father like you.” Apparently, the backstory on this dramz was that during Juan and Clare’s last one-on-one, the Venezuelan soccer player decided to whisper softly in her ear, “I love f- – -ing you but I don’t know you,” a source shared with US Weekly. Ouch. Enough said.

Either way, Juan Pablo’s lack luster goodbyes with Crawley (she refused to even give him a hug) made way for him to choose Nikki Ferrell — with whom he awkwardly declared his love for on-screen by saying, “I love lots of things about you,” without elaborating on any details.

See More: The Most Memorable Bachelor and Bachelorette Couples of All Time

The Wine-Making Romance Gone Wrong (Ben Flajnik and Courtney Robertson)

Possibly one of the most hated contestants of all time, finalist Courtney Robertson *somehow* won Ben Higgins’ heart despite being quite the villain on the show. Even though their on-screen proposal was quite heartfelt and appeared to be genuine, once the cameras turned off — it was quite the different story. Most recently, the model-turned-luxury real estate agent was reported to be making a “tell all” book which aired the couple’s (very) dirty laundry. Titled I Didn’t Come Here to Make Friends: Confessions of a Reality Show Villain which divulged all the juicy details about her time on the dating show (including a much-discussed cheating fiasco), including but not limited to the fact that he lurrrrves Justin Bieber and used to say ’10-2′ when he had to go #2 during the show, according to People.

“The only backlash I got was from Ben himself,” Robertson, 31, shared with US Weekly. “I did hear from him. He was not happy. I got a couple of emails. I actually didn’t respond to his last email but I wish him well. He has moved on and I’ve moved on.” In the words of many post-breakup situations — touché.

The Underdog That Everyone’s Rooting For — TWICE (Nick Viall and Kaitlyn Bristowe [and Andi Dorfman )

On Andi Dorfman’s season as her hunky final runner-up, Nick was sent home after a rollercoaster of a reality filming with the former Assistant District Attorney. While it was a calmer breakup than some, Dorfman shared that she was nothing but “love” for her runner-up and “wishes him well.”

Brought back by The Bachelor franchise for a second time for Kaitlyn Bristowe’s season, Nick was AGAIN the runner-up to the finalist — but alas, didn’t win the heart of his bachelorette. When Bristowe broke his heart, however, he didn’t go as meekly as with Doorman. Instead, he told her that her feelings “weren’t real,” and that “It’s not fair for you to say you feel the same, because you don’t.” But it didn’t stop there, with his monologue including some expletives in the limo, saying, “To hear her tell me she loves me more than once, it’s like a f- – – – joke,” he retorted.

Luckily for the rest of America, Viall is still single and ready to mingle — as the newest Bachelor. Here’s to a great season ahead with hopefully lots of LOL-worthy, heartfelt moments, a few tears, meltdowns —and of course Chris Harrison mixed in too.

Diane Kruger was ethereal in Couture, Gabrielle Union brought the drama in white lace, and Aja Naomi King dripped in glamour and feathers. Here, the red carpet looks we couldn’t get enough of this week.

Diane Kruger at the New York City Ballet 2016 Fall Gala: Diane Kruger and Giambattista Valli are a sartorial match made in heaven. The stylish actress frequently opts for the brand for fashionable events and this week, she slipped into one of his Couture designs. Her floral mini dress with puff sleeves and rope detailing couldn’t have been any more chic—perfect for your warm weather engagement party or bridal shower when bare legs are called for. Her playful ponytail and metallic sandals are great complements for such a flirty ensemble, though the frock could easily be paired with a topknot and flats if sky-high heels aren’t your thing.

See More: Emily Ratajkowski, Diane Kruger, and Chloe Grace Moretz Are Your Newest Bridal Beauty Inspirations

Gabrielle Union at the Birth of a Nation Hollywood Premiere: If you’re looking for drama and a head-turning silhouette, you can always count on Rodarte. Gabrielle Union chose a white lace gown from the brand with a thigh-high slit this week—a high-fashion wedding gown if ever there was one. Her intricate updo was definitely ceremony-worthy, but don’t be afraid to opt for a sleek chignon if you’re doing your hair yourself or want to have the focus land on your natural beauty and your dress.

Aja Naomi King at the Birth of a Nation Hollywood Premiere: Though How To Get Away With Murder star Aja Naomi King is quite buttoned-up on the small screen, she is an absolute risk tasker on the red carpet. Her feather-accented Huishan Zhang gown was the epitome of elegance and luxury: another wedding-perfect stunner if you’re a fashion-forward bride-to-be. Her shiny swoop is ideal for a Fall or Winter wedding, when you won’t have to worry about perspiration. And imagine throwing a fur topper over this for a chilly ceremony? Absolute perfection.

Okay, so what is going on these two?! Wedding bell rumors have been swirling around Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton for MONTHS now. There’s no hiding how truly smittin’ the pop princess is with her country singing beau, and with every new piece of bling Stefani steps out with on her finger and new sources claiming very week that the couple is definitely tying the knot, we must say that we’re getting a little impatient with waiting for them to say “I do.” So what’s the deal? Just how much longer are we going to have to wait for this wedding? Well, someone finally point-blanked asked the maybe-a-bride-to-be, herself! (Finally, right?)

Rumors of a secret engagement between Shelton and Stefani broke this past summer when reports surfaced that the pair have already recruited a wedding planner to help with the big day details. And earlier this month, a source also revealed to Us Weekly that the couple hopes to walk down the aisle as soon as the end of this year in a country-chic backyard wedding.

“Gwen has said they both want something more low-key than their first weddings,” the explained source. “It would likely be at Blake’s ranch [in Oklahoma] or in the backyard. Gwen doesn’t really care, she is just in love with Blake and their life together.” So we can expect that wedding invitation in the mail any day now, right?

During Stefani’s recent interview with Ellen DeGeneres on her daytime talkshow, the pair discussed Stefani’s summer tour that she just wrapped up, her three adorable sons, and — wait for it — wedding plans!

See More: TBT: Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale’s Iconic Wedding Photos

Of course DeGeneres just had to bring up those nuptial rumors. (How could she help herself, right?) “Before I make plans, because I make plans way ahead of time, tell me when you’re getting married,” she told the “Make Me Like You” singer. YES! Us too, please!!!

“I just need to know so I can clear that schedule,” the daytime talk show host continued, as Stefani laughed.

“Okay,” the pop star promised. “I’ll let you know.”

Okay, so that’s not exactly the straightforward “Yes, I’m getting married!” response that we were hoping for. But one thing’s for sure: Ellen DeGeneres will definitely be making that guest list!

A wise man once said that age is nothing but a number, but there is still a negative image in our society attached to women marrying out of their age bracket, unflatteringly labeled “cougars.” We tracked down six brides whose love stories with their significantly younger husbands will be enough to change your opinion on how old is too old to ‘rob the cradle!’

“I married a man 15 years younger than myself — I was 41; he 26 and just out of college. His family was depressed; mine was shocked. Because so many friends teased me mercilessly, my ex-husband included, about my ‘boy toy’, I decided to plan a wedding in Disneyland just to celebrate my guy’s youthful spirit and snub my nose at naysayers. We got married by The Walt Disney World Resort by Chaplain Reverend Tim, who loved our age difference and helped us celebrate our union. We’ve now been happily married for over 20 years. He’s still my boy toy.” — Mindy

“We met on a cougar dating site — I was 48; he was 29. I was newly divorced and just looking for some fun. But things quickly turned serious — partly because we share the same wacky sense of humor. For example, so many people said I was robbing the cradle when I told them about the relationship that during the ceremony we actually had a cradle up at the altar with us!” — Jill

“I’d been married before so wasn’t interested in a big party. Been there, done that. I would have been happy eloping. But, being 24 years my junior, Tim wanted to experience every moment of pledging his life to another. He volunteered to plan all the details of our wedding. All I had to do was buy a cocktail dress — not white! — and show up. We had 60 guests, a harpist, waiters in white gloves, and a ceremony so romantic and sweet the memory still takes my breath away.” — Steph

“This may sound a little weird but my daughter was so happy that after a decade of widowhood her mom found someone — even if that someone was 18 years younger — that she performed the ceremony!” — Ann

“My brother and two sons were apoplectic when I said I was marrying a man who was in grade school the first time I walked down the aisle. They refused to have anything to do with the wedding, and said they would wait to see me when I came to my senses. Their rejection hurt a great deal. My husband Ken’s family was fine about the age difference; indeed they planned a lovely party in their backyard where we said our vows. Ken’s younger sister was our flower girl. It took nine months but my family eventually came around. In fact, last Thanksgiving my daughter invited Ken’s parents and sister to join us for Thanksgiving. That really gave me a reason for gratitude.” — Laura

“It’s cliché but we married in Vegas where a 30 year age different felt pretty normal. Breaking it to our families and friends was tough but it’s our lives, not theirs! My wedding pictures are hysterical — an Elvis impersonator is lifting me into the air while my new husband is strutting the guitar, singing, ‘You Ain’t Nothing But a Hound Dog.'” — Arleen

See More: “I Never Thought I’d Get Married Until…”

Sherry Amatenstein, LCSW is a New York City-based marriage therapist and author.

Rustic weddings as we know them (think burlap and mason jars galore) may be a thing of the past, but nowadays couples are finding creative ways to infuse their rustic roots with some modern flare. From messy florals to mismatched chairs, here are six fresh rustic trends to try at your own wedding.

1. Mismatched chairs
Lately, event producer Andr&#233 Wells of Events By Andr&#233 Wells, has been creating seating that allows for comfort at rustic weddings, such as banquette style. “We also use an eclectic chair mix, from antique chairs to the chiavari ballroom style to the farm cross back chairs, all at the same table,” he says. You can also add in some ghost chairs for an even more modern rustic look.

2. Mismatched vintage china
No need for burlap and mason jars when you got your grandma’s china, right? To add color and life to your table, Ilana Ashley of Ilana Ashley Events recommends mixing and matching vintage china. “For a put together look, select pieces that are similar in size, and have a shared commonality like color scheme or theme (e.g. floral pattern, gold rimmed).”

3. Fresh produce
Whether in bridesmaid bouquets or centerpieces, fresh produce is all the rage right now in the rustic world! For example, this rustic table setting (above) is reminiscent of a harvest feast, notes Michael Ciano, Events Designer for Winston Flowers in Boston, MA. Here, he portrays a feeling of bounty that is on trend by using lots of small textures, instead of big flowers, with fruit, vegetables, nuts and berries. “Specifically, this design features anemones, kale, figs, persimmon, berries and grasses. The elements are natural and rustic, yet sophisticated, in balanced earth tones of plum, burgundy, gold and green.” Um, obsessed!

See More: The 4 Fall 2016 Wedding Trends That are All the Rage Right Now

4. Rustic meets glam
Rustic country is so done! Now it’s all about glamming it up. According to planner Dawn Stafford of Gathering Souls, the d&#233cor for these events will match up rustic elements, like a barn venue, and mix them with a glamorous chandelier made of crystal. Another popular go-to? “Elaborate china on rustic wooden tables.” Wedding photographer Lelia Bartruff of Lelia Marie Photography says this is one of her favorite new trends. Specifically, when brides pair delicate lace and old china with the rough wooden farm tables. “It adds a beautiful dimension, uniqueness, and elegance to a barn wedding.”

5. Messy florals
We don’t know about you, but we’re wild for this rustic floral trend! As wedding planner Kelli Corn of Kelli Corn Weddings points out, there’s definitely a movement now in “organic” locally grown flowers. “Farmgirl flowers, for instance, are a huge hit right now!” As far as style goes, think picked straight from a field and effortlessly thrown together to create wildly beautiful yet utterly elegant centerpieces. Garlands are also having a rustic moment, notes event designer Stephanie Welch of Stephanie Welch Style. “Garland running down the table with florals mixed in, in lieu of traditional centerpieces, or garland draping over the bar during cocktail hour. It’s more of a messy pretty kind of look.”

6. Rustic hors d’oeuvres displays and trays
Rhea Merrill, Catering Manager at Lurcat Catering, says wooden boards with charcuterie and bread displays are popular at rustic weddings right now. Rachel Bruzek, D’Amico Catering Senior Creative Event and Trend Specialist, agrees. “Using rustic wood platters for passing hors d’oeuvres during the cocktail hour is another trend.”

One step closer to that very first kiss and full frontal hugs! Counting On star Jinger Dugger and her fiancé Jeremy Vuolo are well into the wedding planning process and we can’t wait to see how their big day shapes up. First on their list of wedding to-do’s? Venue hunting! Choosing your dream wedding venue is obvi a top priority for brides-to-be. (We sure don’t need to tell you that!) After all, your “I do” locale can end up totally setting the stage for the rest of the big day details, as the guest list, theme, and décor are all dependent on finding the perfect space. So where is the newest to-be-wedded Duggar thinking of tying the knot? Hint: It’s not where her two older sisters previously got hitched!

It looks like this Duggar is breaking tradition and opting not to get married in her family’s home state of Arkansas, where siblings Jessa and Jill both tied the knot in 2014. Yes, Jinger is planning to cross state lines to marry Vuolo and recently documented her wedding planning road trip on her family’s Facebook page.

“At the hotel on a wedding planning trip,” Duggar wrote, posting a pic of the trip. “I am so blessed to have so many wonderful sisters to share this process with. Since we have done a few already, we got the hang of it!” By the time their 19th kid gets hitched, we’re sure Jim Bob and Michelle will have wedding planning down to a two-week process!

See More: Why the Duggar Family Won’t Be Accepting That Wedding Invitation You Sent Them

While the bride-to-be didn’t reveal the exact location for her venue, International Business Times reports that Duggar and Vuolo will most likely be tying the knot in the groom’s hometown of Laredo, Texas where he currently resides — which totally makes sense. “We’re trying to keep it intimate, between family and friends,” Vuolo previously revealed to Us Weekly. “We want to be very intentional with who we invite.” Destination weddings are a great way to cut down on the guest list, after all!

The groom has also been getting involved in the big day details since proposing to Duggar back in August. (Way to pull your own weight, Vuolo!) “Wow, there is LOTS to do to plan a wedding, Vuolo wrote on his Facebook page.

You’re telling us!

How do you fall in love? That was the question I set out to answer. As a biologist, I understand what happens to the brain when you fall in love. It is the increase or decrease of certain neurotransmitters that gave you that unmistakable euphoric feeling of love.

But, how do you get there? What causes one person to fall in love and not another?

As I pondered this question, I had the opportunity to explore it with my cousin, who has a PhD in Biochemistry. During our discussion, my then 95-year-old Grandmother interrupted me to say, “You young people don’t know anything about love.” She was obviously right. That’s why we were having the discussion.

She then said, “Back in my day, a girl knew if she wanted a guy to fall in love, she couldn’t sleep with him right away. She’ll fall in love, but a boy doesn’t fall in love that way.”

I had heard that logic before, such as the three-date rule, or the 90-day rule in Steve Harvey‘s book Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man. Those rule suggest that you wait a certain time before you begin a sexual relationship. But, I didn’t think there was any science to support that idea. So I set out to learn first, how we fall in love and second, if my grandmother was right?

See More: 50 Love Quotes That Express Exactly What ‘I Love You’ Really Means

Researchers in Emory University decided to investigate the process using a unique creature, the monogamous prairie vole. What they discovered helped us to understand how people fall in love. They realized that the process is different for males than for females. Put in human terms, men and women fall in love differently.

See More: How To Find Love (And Know It’s For REAL This Time)

In this 2016 TEDxBocaRaton talk, I explain what the researchers found. What neurotransmitters must increase to reach the neurological tipping point of falling in love. I explain the importance of dopamine and oxytocin levels for women, and dopamine, testosterone and vasopressin for men. But, even more important, how do they increase in each of us and how our behavior effects that increase.

Finally, I assess if my Grandmother’s wisdom holds up to scientific scrutiny. Please take a look at How Your Brain Falls In Love:

See More: 26 Bittersweet Quotes That Illustrate That Love Knows No Distance

This article originally appeared on YourTango.

When it comes to wedding day music, couples are often torn between deciding on a DJ or a live band. The one thing everyone can agree on? Music can make (or break) a party. To make the decision process a bit easier, we’ve compiled a list of our four favorite New Jersey wedding bands, sure to get your guests on the dance floor “All Night Long” (…see what we did there?).

Brian Kirk & The Jirks
This 9-12 piece band with Jersey Shore origins has been bringing the music to weddings for the past 10 years, and averages over 60 weddings a year. With an unbelievable horn section, talented vocalists, and dynamic party-presence, Brian Kirk and The Jirks are certain to blow you away with their energy. For your big day, they provide a full production of sound and lighting. With a unique “interactive band” mentality, BK&J offer personalized, one-on one attention and communication with all of their couples to ensure they provide them with the music vibes of their wedding dreams. Read real brides’ reviews here!

The Nerds
Behind the thick-rimmed glasses and plaid shirts, this New Jersey-born band specializes in soul and classic rock. For over 25 years, The Nerds have brought music, dancing, and fun to weddings and events throughout the state and country. Loosely based on an SNL skit, The Nerds are exclusively booked through S.T.A.R.S. Productions and call themselves “America’s Rock and Roll Fun-Omenon.” Their celebratory and sometimes silly vibes combined with their musical flair makes the band the perfect wedding entertainment for the couple looking to celebrate, laugh, and dance the whole night through. Read real brides’ reviews here!

See More: Wow Your Guests With One Of Our Favorite Live Entertainers

The Benjamins
This popular NJ band performs at over 200 live events per year, making them a powerful force in the music industry. The Benjamins combine oldies, classics, pop, rock, swing, and more to bring the party to your party. With a high energy yet sophisticated style, this band brings a one-of-a-kind experience with them as they aim to keep your guests dancing and partying all night long. With mesmerizing stage presence and an impressive vocal range and repertoire, The Benjamins have also won WeddingWire’s Couple’s Choice Awards for the past three years, and it’s no surprise why. Read real brides’ reviews here!

Platinum Band Music
With 10 musicians playing together to bring high-energy dance music to your celebration, Platinum Band consists of experienced and skilled musicians ready to share their talents with you and your wedding guests. With performance options spanning across Top 40, Classic 80s, Motown Hits, Standards, and everything in-between, this band is sure to rock your party, in whichever way your hearts desire. Whether you want to rock out all night to hits inspired by Bon Jovi and Springsteen or prefer the likes of Pitbull and Calvin Harris, Platinum Band Music has got you covered. Read real brides’ reviews here!

These bands not quite striking a cord with you? We have more to choose from on our Local Vendors page!

Lupita Nyong’o is a pro at color, Olivia Wilde shows a smokey eye doesn’t have to be intense and Emily Blunt is a radiant dream. Here are the celebrity looks that gave us major bridal beauty inspiration on the red carpet this week.

Lupita Nyong’o at the premiere of Queen of Katwe: If you love color as much as Lupita Nyong’o — the star loves to coordinate her eyeshadow with her gown — why not coordinate your own beauty look with your wedding day accent color? To really make the color pop, choose the right tone for your skin — the darker your skin, the lighter the eyeshadow should be, while darker hues will play well against light skin tones. And you can also break the traditional ‘don’t play up the eyes and lips’ rule by adding a lip that is bright and in a different color family than the eye. Bright pink and dusty lavender like Lupita wore are a gorgeous, trendy combination.

Olivia Wilde at the Friars Clubs Honors Martin Scorsese event: Beautifully smokey, but not heavy-handed, Olivia Wilde’s makeup is perfect for the fall bride. To get the look, buff a light- or medium-coverage foundation into your skin with a wet makeup sponge, so your skin looks even, but not matte. Add more of that gorgeous glow with a fresh pink on the apples of the cheeks and highlighter along the cheekbones and down the center of the face. For the eyes, begin by lining with a brown kohl pencil and then smudge the line at the outer corners. Layer a copper-colored shadow from the upper lashline to the crease, and below the lower lashes from the center to the inner corners. Add a darker brown into the crease and around the outer corners and apply a few coats of mascara. Dab a bit of highlighter or shimmery eyeshadow to the inner corners, and the eyes are complete. Line and color in matching pink tones to finish.

Emily Blunt at the premiere of The Girl on the Train: Doesn’t Emily Blunt define ‘bridal glow’? Her look is perfect for an outdoor bride, and is easy to achieve. First, use a BB Cream to even out any imperfections, but still allow the details of your skin to show through. Dab a touch of light pink blush on the apples of your cheeks, and use a pink gloss on your lips. For the eyes, use a gray kohl eyeliner, and then smudge your line, so it isn’t too perfect. For a bit more depth, use a matte, gray shadow and smudge it all along the lashline, and apply several coats of mascara.