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No matter how much you already get along with your future mother-in-law, before you find yourself decked out in the wedding dress of your dreams, about to marry the love of your life, it’s important to sit down and have a heart-to-heart conversation with the mom of your beloved. Now that you’re joining the family, and maybe even filling some of the roles in your S.O.’s life that mama used to take care of, you have to make sure you have your bases covered and expectations set. Wondering what the important topics to cover are? Here are seven convos to have with your future mother-in-law before your walk down that aisle.
1. What’s One Thing I Should Know?
Kick things off by having a conversation with your future MIL about things you should know about her son or daughter that you may not know already. She may tell you some funny stories or even show you photos from childhood that you’ll never let your soon-to-be spouse forget.
2. How Do I Deal With Him When He’s Hungry?
Because everyone can use a little info booster on how to pick someone out of a hangry mood — salty, sweet… what snack will do the trick?
3. You Know I’m Not Pushing You Out of His Life
Make it clear to her that while you’re going to be the person who spends the most time with her son, he’ll always be a mommy’s boy — you’re not pushing her out of his life. This will provide her with a huge hug of comfort.
4. You Can Be In Charge of Certain Holidays
If there are some traditional holidays that your future MIL likes to host at home, let her know you’d still like to do them at her house, and pick up any holidays that she doesn’t feel strongly about.
5. We’ll Talk Kids When We’re Ready
Since there’s a ring on your finger, your future MIL may already be riding the kid train. Let her know that you’ll open up the gates for baby talk when you and your fiancé are ready.
6. You’ll Always Be His Mom
Say it again and again: she’ll always be his mom, and there are certain things and roles that only a mother can do and fill.
See More: Real Brides Share Heartwarming Mother-in-Law Stories (You’ll Wish These Were Your MILs!)
Jen Glantz is a “Professional Bridesmaid” and the founder of Bridesmaid for Hire. She’s the author of All My Friends Are Engaged and frequently wears old bridesmaid dresses to the grocery store and on first dates.